i dont want many things. the more i recreate myself, the more i notice i dont enjoy my tech thinking for me. it is similar to luddism: i enjoy the machine as a tool, but i want it to be my tool, and not the other way around.

phones are the worst offender. they are especially agressive thinkers, because even the damn keyboard has to be smart to not give you typos every few words (by changing the actual hitbox of each key). if youre in a terminal, you wont get this feature because the smarts are disabled, which is good except now you need to correct yourself every few words. but a terminal is about the most freedom from smarts you can usually get. some chat apps are quite toolful as well, like deltachat, but many still try to be smarter than that, which i hate. many phones will also keep nagging you to turn on automatic brightness. no. fuck off.

LLMs are also a type of smarts that i dont want. i will give them the credit that their apparent immediate intelligence is higher than some people i have met, and that they are somewhat general in their knowledge, but they are the opposite of what i want. i want a tool that i control, but LLMs are static and they try to replace my thinking instead of complementing it. other people at least tend to be dynamic and creative; no such thing here. an LLM is like if you mixed all of the beautiful colors together to create a brownish puke. puke theoretically has all the delightful nutrients in it that you ate, its the perfect meal, except fuck no. i dont want your puke cocktail, anthropic. and i especially dont want to depend on a tool that is neither a tool (because it turns what i create with it into a black box just like the LLM itself) nor is it mine.

social media is also a fake tool, most of the time. you usually dont create anything of value, and you dont even get good entertainment. you get rage and fear, and you dont even own the horrors you write.