good evening. i am writing this because i am bored and like the idea of writing something rn. so you know how i have played on and modded for minecraft anarchy servers starting around 2019-2020? maybe you did, or not, idc, now you know. so it just so happens that these places are cancerous and minecraft's code terrible. because of this, it would be incredibly convenient to leave that behind me. unfortunately however, i have an addiction to writing minecraft cheats.

minecraft is a game with infinite possibilities - ...for bad code, and mojang used most of them. mojang is now trying to fix it but failing and making it worse because they think applying enterprise style to their code will make it anything but worse. what was once a few lines to do, with simple logic, now takes several files, both in the game and in mods. it would thus be incredibly convenient if i was done with it, but unfortunately for my nonexistent sanity, i am not. instead, i wrote a new rendering system. and then a new and unintended way to generate chunks without a proper world. which failed, so im now spinning up a server for it - fuck.

unlike thalber, who i shamelessly stole the idea to make this """"blog"""" from, i dont even write documentation. this is because i dont care and the repo is private anyway. i dont know why i bother with quality code either, i just do. something evil is within me that demands it. and also boredom, but i dont know why i dont use it for something better, like cleaning my fUCKING room. but i dont do that because there is no rewarding aspect to it at all, until its done, and then im kinda happy and then it starts again.

i lie to myself that one day this client will make money, or be appreciated in any way, but this is a lie and i dont know why i still believe it. or that someone will use it and like it and tell me so, or that at least it will be satisfying when its done. but it will never be done, and it offers nothing people think is worth switching for, even tho i disagree. my delusions will not end though, not for a while. and so i will continue coding, sometimes, for just as long a while. i need to do this, i dont know why, it is just needed, and i will.

anarchy servers are a terrible place, but they also remain one of the few places where doing things like using cheats is not looked down upon, and some twisted appeal for "survival mode but everyone hates you and its actually creative mode" still exists for me and i wish it didnt because it would be much more convenient. but it does and it is inconvenient and thats okay and i will just do what the fuck i want anyway.